14 Days of Love - Day 4 - The Perfect Wedding

The Perfect Wedding... Eric was the perfect groom. He didn't have many opinions about our wedding and let me have full reign on most things, but when I needed a decision made, he would make it for me. Preparing for my wedding was so much fun, my family and best friends were soo excited and made the event wonderful. The morning of my wedding, I was soo excited, I couldn't contain myself. I didn't get much sleep the night before, but it didn't slow me down. I went and got my hair done, it looked beautiful, I had told Eric that I was going to have it all up, which he didn't really like, but surprised him by having it only half up, with curls down my back. I had a tiara with a veil in the back, and the most beautiful wedding dress, that fit me just right. I did my own make up, so that it would look light and natural, I didn't want to look like someone else on my wedding day. I felt absolutely beautiful. Our wedding colors were silver and bubble gum pink, I had white & pink daisies everywhere. Everything was perfect, especially the handsome groom :)  


Things I love about him: He's handsome & easy going

14 Days of Love - Day 3 - Engagement

I'm sorry for the delay, life has gotten the best of me :( But I am turning it around now :)

Engagement... Eric's proposal, was a bit of a surprise, it wasn't a total shock, I was suspecting it, but I've always been a dreamer, so I figured I was wrong. It was Christmas morning, Eric wasn't able to go to utah for Christmas, because he was working at Costco and couldn't get time off. He was lucky that he had Christmas off. He came to our house on christmas morning, bearing gifts, which he placed under the tree. We waited for my sister and her family to come over and then began opening gifts. At one point, I was handed a gift, I opened it to find a brown box, inside the box in packing paper was a rock that was being held together with a rubber band, I took the rubber band off and out came a plastic green ring. Eric took the ring, got down on his knee and asked me to marry him, my family was standing by in shock. I said YES!! He gave me a kiss and I sat back stunned. I was so excited to be getting married!! The next few months were fun, but painfully long. Eric was super excited and soo much fun to be around during this time. The fact that he was committed to me changed his view of our relationship and it was a welcomed change. 


Things I love about him: He's Family oriented, He likes to make me happy

14 Days of Love - Day 2 - Dating

Dating... Some of my favorite dating memories are sitting in the quad at fullerton college, just hanging out in between classes. In the very beginning, I would find a spot in the library that I knew Eric would pass , just so that I could spend a few minutes with him. Sometimes I wouldn't even need to be at school anymore, but I would hang around just to see him. As we started to spend more time together, we would often hang out with nothing to do in between classes just basking in the warmth of the sun, talking about silly things that often weren't interesting to me, but I would pretend to be interested and just enjoy hearing him talk. We had a lot of special places at the school where we would hang out together or we would go for a walk and eat lunch at the taco bell nearby. I don't think he realized at the time, that he was winning my heart over, by taking me to my favorite fast food restaurant. One of my favorite times was when Eric was on the water polo team at fullerton college, I attended every game. I was so proud of his strength and agression in the game. It was just so much fun sitting in the bleachers and watching him play. I also enjoyed working in youth ministry together, the youth didn't know we were dating, but it was fun to see the way he worked with the youth and cared so much about them. It was during this time that I learned how much people are drawn to Eric. How comfortable they are around him and how he can always make an awkward or stressful room of people burst out laughing. He may not be a class clown, but he's great for a good laugh when it's most needed.

Things I love about him: He's laid back, dedicated to what he does, he's manly, friendly, & funny

14 Days of Love - Day 1 - When we first met

Inspired by my friend, Nicole Milkie over at Olive Blue, I've decided to do a series called, 14 days of love, dedicated to my husband. I plan on sharing the reasons why I love my husband, along with little tidbits of our life together. 

When We First Met... I didn't like Eric, it wasn't love at first sight. I told my friends they should stay away :) I soon found out that I was wrong, one of many times Eric would make me realize this. My mother's first impression was that he was a very nice boy, and she really liked him, the same impression my best friend had. I just wasn't interested. We saw each other regularly at a friends house where we would hang out around each other, but not with each other. The first time I talked to him was on my brother's birthday, we along with other friends got dressed up, prom style, and went out for birthdays (our 1st official night on the town). Over the months, I got used to seeing him around, and when he left to visit his family for the holidays, I noticed his absence. I missed the company at the game nights, and began to wonder why. When he came back, I talked to him briefly, and was happy to see him. This was the beginning of our love. 

Things I love about him: He's great company

The Seven Year Itch

Marriage, it has been on my heart for a while now. For years I've been longing for love, wondering why I feel so needy and unsure, always questioning him, telling him it's not enough. I've even laid it out for him, just bring me flowers, maybe that will help. Four years later, still no flowers. He's told me this is just who he is, and I scold myself, why would you want to change him. But still, something is missing, I just can't put my finger on what it is or what I need. Six years into my marriage I give up, I tell the Lord, maybe it's you I'm looking for, I'm expecting my husband to be perfect, to be something he's not. When all I need is to accept God's love.

This is when he springs it on me, "I should've been loving you more" I can hear the pain in his voice, regret for the years wasted. In statement, it's good, but as I dig deeper, all I can feel is pain. This is what I get for surrendering to God, the past dug up and poured out in front of me, the one that I've been running from. It's one thing to suspect it, it's another to hear that it's true. All I can feel is the knife in my chest, twisting with each word. He says it's the spark that's missing, and I wonder if I've ever had a spark for him. As I go back to those days of falling in love, I can feel it all over again, The butterfly's in my stomach, the confidence from God, and the pain of the unrequited love. I know I had a spark, he was all I wanted. I was so sure that God was leading me toward him, that God would teach him to love me too. I knew as I was going into it, that I liked him more. I remember each step he took. It's as if our relationship was a cold pool, I jumped right in, knowing it would be cold, but there is some excitement and exhilaration in jumping in, and later it would feel refreshing and fun, but he's been walking in slowly afraid of the cold, agonizing over every step. I saw the battle going on in his head as he pondered over each decision. He now tells me that most people are able to look back and remember when they were head over heals in love, but we never had that, he pauses and I can hear every breath, my heart's beating through my chest and I wonder if he knows that I was head over heals, he continues, or maybe it was just me. It's then I remember telling all my friends about our relationship, how excited I was, how I would go home and think about him. I remember our first kiss, and staying up and talking with my mom for hours afterwords, so full of excitement and hope. I also remember him never missing me, never hating to leave, or wanting to stay. I feel as though everything he's done, he's done out of obligation. Was our relationship even real? or did I imagine it all, I remember our wedding and our honeymoon, surely he loved me then, surely there was a spark. What does that even mean?

As the days go by, I know, I can't keep thinking about this, I have to live in the now. I realize now, how much I love my husband and how I've been holding back, so that I'm not hurt and disappointed by him. I know my husband loves me. I know God is doing a mighty work. I trust Him, He's always been good to me. "Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength" Neh 8:10 I need that Joy, thirst for it. Although it feels like I've been betrayed by my God and my husband, like the years have been wasted, I know I had a part in this. I walked away, I didn't stay close to the Lord, I didn't pray for my husband, I didn't love him like I should. I thank God that we have Him, knowing if we didn't, this could end in adultery or divorce, He saved us and is only trying to bless us. I don't want to walk down this road, but if the end result is a husband that loves me with his whole heart, one that is head over heals in love with me. I will do it. I want nothing more than to love and be loved. I know he is the one for me and I know God is working. This is a new beginning...

Advent Calendar Day 2

Today we changed our calendar to 23, and added stockings which I found at michaels, in the scrapbooking section. They were originally stickers, I just took the backing off. Later we will put things in the stockings. I also used hooks for hook and eyes for the stockings.

Advent Calendar Day 1

I have to put all of my crafty projects on my blog instead of facebook, because I don't want the whole world knowing that I'm a nerd, :) hehe. Anyways, here is a project that I started last christmas and am going to finish it this year, unless I go into labor before that happens. This is our advent calendar. I sewed all of these pieces on a piece of white felt on my sewing machine, I was able to add the train tracks on the rug using a stitch on my machine. Each day we are going to add something new to the picture and count down on the calendar. Today we added the christmas lights. I used hooks from hooks and eyes that I bought from michael's to string the lights on. I just hand stitched them on the sides of the tree, so you can take the lights off and on.