My Brilliant Nonsense

I'm slowly learning...

2012-01-08T21:24:00.000-08:00

I've been spending some time, thinking about some of the things we go through as parents of little ones. They can be so trying... One of the hardest parts for me is just the constant responsibility of caring for them, I know that sounds bad, but getting them fed and dressed and bathed and changing the diapers is tiring. I have a hard time pushing past myself and on somedays am so anxious and frustrated that I can't do anything that I want to do, because I have to take care of these children. It seems like dinner times are the worst, I'm prepping dinner, frazzled and frustrated because eric is supposed to be home now, desperately hoping eric will walk through the door any minute to help with the children. And that's when one of them walks up to me and asks for chocolate milk, I snap at them and tell them, "NO, Dinner is cooking, wait for dinner." If they proceed to complain, I yell at them, "NO, dinner is cooking, just be patient!!" Not even realizing the irony in that. Maybe if I displayed more patience while waiting for dad to get home, they might learn how to be patient from my example, fancy that! I recently had a breakthrough in this area, and it's inspired me to try harder...

It was just one of those days, I woke up with a sore throat, I wanted desperately to stay in bed and not have to get up when eric left for work. But, I pulled myself up and started doing the things I have to do at the beginning of the day (Feed any kids that are hungry, change diapers, make sure anthony uses the bathroom) slightly praising myself for already doing better than yesterday, but as I was changing Becca's diaper, I noticed she had spots on her stomach and back, she had been having fevers for a couple of days.

This was a problem, I knew I would have to take her to the doctor. I started worrying, not about my daughter, but about how I would have to go to a new doctor and I don't know if I'll like him, I won't be able to just sit and rest all day, like I had planned, I'm going to have to get all the kids dressed and out the door, and I just didn't want to. But as I looked at my baby girl, I knew I had to suck it up, I have to take care of her more than myself. So I went into Mother Mode. I made an appointment, got everyone ready, ate lunch and headed out the door.

I arrived at the doctor in heels (hoping to make myself look older) with no stroller, because I was too lazy to run back up and open the garage to put it in the car. I held Becca, who was doing a good job complaining about being sick and looking very pitiful. Trying to fill out forms with one hand, the other two children buzzing around at my feet, and Becca trying to steal my pen. I finally get in the dr, that goes smoothly, but he tells me we should draw blood from Becca just in case she has the measles (She didn't, she had roseola, and is fine now).

So with all three kids I walk out the door to go get her blood drawn, while on the way to the car, Anthony falls and scrapes up his wrist and knees. He burst into tears and starts crying out for his dad, full of drama. I stopped, comforted him and led him to the car. Meanwhile, Alissa has been limping and complaining because her toe hurts, she had hurt it a few nights before and wasn't happy that she had to wear shoes. So, we finally get to the lab, and I get Becca all settled to get her blood drawn, the other kids just sitting by and watching, (not the greatest idea but I didn't have much choice). It took about 5 minutes of Becca screaming bloody murder, for them to get the blood. Alissa in the background, "I don't want to watch this, it's too scary, I don't like it". Anthony just running around trying to make people laugh (That's his coping mechanism).

With this done, we walk out the door, Becca screaming all the way to the car. I get her in her seat, still screaming. I get Anthony buckled and he starts screaming about his wrist and knees hurting, crying for daddy. Alissa is barely holding it together. I close the door and take a breath. All I can think is I must drive through and get a snack, this is how I know I'm barely holding it together. This is my coping mechanism, soda and a snack from a fast food place. However, we are short on money and I knew I shouldn't. I talked myself out of it, got home, gave the older kids a Popsicle and the let them watch a movie while I made dinner.

Talk about a long day, I was so ready to call it a night. I started making dinner, and decided that I should make cookies because I was really craving something sweet. Of course, the kids wanted to help and Becca wanted to be held. I held it together, got dinner in the oven. Cookies were put on hold, I figured I would just do one ingredient at a time. That's when I got the text, Eric was stuck in traffic, That's ok I thought, dinner won't be ready for a while anyways, no big deal. Dinner finishes and Eric walks through the door. From the moment I see him, I can tell he doesn't feel good. I hand him the baby while I dish up and eat and he tries to hold it together. Before I finish he hands her back to me and runs to the bathroom. I take her, finish eating and feeding her. He comes back and lays on the couch.

This is where my breakthrough happened. Thoughts were running through my head... I was hoping he'd rescue me, I don't feel that great either, why can't he just suck it up, etc... But I stop myself and start thinking, I went into mother mode today, I didn't feel that bad, I can push through, finish the day strong and be the good wife, that lets him rest. So, I get up off my butt and start making cookies with the kids, I run to the store to get milk for Becca and eggs for cookies. I took the older kids and made sure that Becca was happily playing in her room before I left, so Eric could have some quiet. We get home and finished the cookies, while Becca fell asleep with Eric on the couch. And at the end of the day, the best part of the day was the last part, that I spent with the kids, making cookies and going to the store. I cherished the time I spent with them. I would've missed out on a special time with them, if I would've let my attitude get the best of me. I'm so thankful to have learned this lesson.

Parenting is hard, that is true. But as Christians, we are to persevere through hard times, die to ourselves, serve and love others. If we do this in ministry to other's, shouldn't we more-so with our own children? And through it, We will be blessed. When we see our children do the same for each other, or in the special times we get to enjoy with them. I will choose to live life with an attitude of service to my family instead of in service to myself. I pray that God will give me strength to persevere, and a reminder to change my attitude when I forget.

First Week Of School

2011-09-11T23:57:00.000-07:00

We had a very successful week of school!! It does depend on what you define as a successful homeschool day, but the way I define it, it went great. We didn't finish everything, and did much less on the last 2 days of the week. However, we stuck to it. We did the basics everyday. We had fun together and enjoyed learning new things. Pretty much everything we did worked well. We did have a hard time with the blocco puzzles, we'll have to keep working at those. But we loved Camelot Jr.

Getting Ready for School - Part 3

2011-08-31T22:26:00.000-07:00

Today, I'm showing you how I plan on organizing my school journey. I would love to have a cool notebook full of sheets, calendars, to do lists, etc.. But I can never get that far, so I only have a few things to show you. I started out figuring out how much I need to do each subject and making a check off list for that. Here it is. Next I've made a schedule, this is a very rough draft. I'm not going to stick to a strict schedule, this will just give me direction. Some things don't need to be done everyday, such as the Animal Study or the Five in a Row, but I'll leave the option there, so that it does get done somedays :)

Next, I've taken five folders and marked them Monday through Friday. These folders will hold the worksheets that we'll be doing for the day. It will include Math, Writing, sometimes Spanish, and any other sheets needed for the day. I also have three for anthony, I'll be putting color & shape worksheets in there along with coloring pages or any others worksheets I have for him.

I will then have the following weeks worksheets in these file folders. At the beginning of the week I'll have everything set, so I can pull out a folder and know what we are doing for the day.

I also have folders for each subject, so if I find a worksheet or something interesting in that subject, I can place it in the folder.

Here are our school boxes, and Alissa excited to start school

And a few more things that arrived, the science kit looks way cute, I'll be buying another one of these for Anthony.

Getting Ready for School - Part 2

2011-08-30T22:44:00.000-07:00

Bible - Bible is what I'm most excited about. We will be reading through this whole bible this year. We have to read 3 stories a week. I'll be making flash cards from one verse I picked to memorize for the entire week from the chapters we're covering. I'm hoping that when we start our day with this, Alissa will soar. We've been working on pray together as a family and she really enjoys that.

Math - I'm using the Math K5 book, we are doing 1 lesson a day. I chose this book, mainly because it is really cute, it has colorful pictures. We are not going to use any of the manipulative's or the teacher's guide, because I want to keep math simple. All of the concepts are easy enough that I can explain them to her or show her them in my own way.

Writing - I'm mainly using Spectrum Early Years, Learning Letters. We will be using this book on Mondays. I'll introduce the letter and then we will use other random books I have to reinforce the letter through out the week. This will take us 26 weeks, and then we'll work on forming words.

Reading - I'm using Teach Your child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons. I have a fondness for this book, because it's what I used to learn to read. Alissa seems to enjoy it also, it works for us and we're sticking to it. I'm also suplementing that with the Reading Eggs.com program. This is a very cute website that teaches kids to read. She really enjoys playing the games. We'll do 3 lessons of the 100 easy lesson book and 2 lessons from ReadingEggs.com a week.

Language Arts - We'll be doing 1 lesson from Language Lessons for Little ones a day and 4 stories a week from What your preschooler needs to know. I think she will love the preschooler needs to know book. She loves any stories or songs.

Science - We'll be doing a unit study on animals, leveraging this book. This is a very cute book, they have multiple topics you can choose from, but I chose animals. We'll do projects and read books about animals 3-5 days a week, just depends on how well it goes.

Five in a Row - We'll be using this just to add some fun to our schooling. We're doing a co-op with our homeschool group, so we will be doing 1 book every 2 weeks. We'll read the book every day and then discuss one topic from the book and then once a week we'll have a day to do projects based on the book, including science projects or craft projects, etc..

Foreign Language - We'll be using this book for spanish, Alissa is thrilled to learn spanish. We'll take a two years to get through this book. It looks a lot like a preschool book, but teaches the spanish words for colors, shapes, letters, etc. We'll also be watching Signing Time to learn some sign language.

Next I'll show you how I'm organizing everything and a schedule of how we're going to get through all this in a week.

Getting Ready for School - Part 1

2011-08-29T21:25:00.000-07:00

Look what arrived in the mail!!! It's time to prep for school, I've received boxes of stuff that I found on timberdoodle.com. I'm so excited to share with you what I'll be doing with Alissa this school year.

Here it all is out of the box, doesn't that look soo fun!

These are for Anthony. I'll be using them to keep him busy. We've already opened the lace-a-shape and Fanta Color Junior, and they work great. The kids both love them and Anthony especially loves the Fanta Color Junior. He completes the puzzles perfectly.

The Colorback Sea-Turtle and PeekaBoo Animals puzzles are also to keep Anthony busy. The Camelot Jr. is for Alissa. You're given pictures and blocks, you have to build what you see in the picture. I'm looking forward to doing this one with her.

These are for Alissa. We have Bloco, these are like foam puzzles, Colorful Caterpillars, this is a game where you roll a dice and then lace a caterpillar. We'll be using the abc cookies to leverage our reading and writing. Crocodile Hop is an active game for the kids to play together.

Here we have Starter Spanish, for Alissa. She's super excited to learn spanish. What your preschooler needs to know is a book of stories, songs, rhymes, and some science and history too. Both of the kids will enjoy this along with the Wii Fit for kids.

Next, I'll show you the actual curriculum we'll be doing this year. This stuff is mostly just to supplement and help keep their hands and minds busy.

I want to be like you :)

2011-08-06T18:49:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling soo blessed with friendships lately! I've had many different seasons of loneliness and insecurities and that makes me so grateful to have so many opportunities in front of me. I'm so thankful for the ladies that have reached out to me and given me an opportunity to be their friends and given me time to open up with them. I know I'm not the most talkative or exciting person to be around, though I would love to be. To be honest, my goal is to be like Tess Benson, super sweet, inviting, accepting, inclusive, and fun to be around. I'm just learning that I need to be confident in who God made me and not worry so much about what other people think of me. As long as I am who God wants me to be, that is who I want to be. I know God is giving me these opportunities to be around His people and build relationships, now I need to be willing to open up. To grab hold of these opportunities and jump in head first :) In order to do this, I need to give each social engagement over to the Lord. To ask for His strength and confidence in each situation. So, I'd like to say thank you to Julee, Kate, Nicole, Tess, Michelle, for inviting me into your circle of friends and for just being super sweet and loving to me :) I love all of you!!

Tiered skirt & Top

2011-07-21T15:39:00.000-07:00

I made this skirt and top a year or two ago. They were super easy to make, I made the cupcake myself. Unfortunately the shirt was too small, but the skirt works great and she still wears it. I think I have a pic of her wearing it too, I'll show you that soon. I also have the links to the tutorials if anybody wants them.

No more Disarray!!

2011-04-05T00:04:00.000-07:00

I've been working hard at creating a schedule, cleaning every day and trying to keep up with household tasks. I'm trying to teach Alissa and Anthony to do some of these things with me. I'm trying to focus on creating little systems and routines that will make us live cleaner. I'm hoping to share these with you as I create them. The latest one was placing little hooks all over the house to hang up various things. One in my kitchen to hang up my apron, one in the bedroom for my husbands hats, two in the kids room, one for Anthony's hats and one for Alissa's bathing suit, goggles, and towel. She has just started a swim class that she will be attending 3 times a week. I have a chore list now, so when I go to do my cleaning, I know where to start, however I haven't gotten through the whole list yet, I'm not sure why not, maybe it's too long or I'm doing too much. I don't really know what the problem is. This is the problem I'm trying to solve. I think it will help when I get on a better schedule, but I feel like I spend a lot of time helping Alissa find things to do. I'm hoping that as I get her more involved in my chores, that she will get easier. Any tips you have for running a household would be much appreciated.

Embracing Joy

2011-03-24T16:33:00.000-07:00

As I sit here, each child sleeping, my prayer is for life, that I would learn to live it to the fullest. To embrace every moment, to be a parent that watches the little ones sleeping, in amazement at what God has made. I want to be a mother that always stops to cherish and hold my little ones. I want to be a mother that disciplines in the way that I should so that I can enable my children to be who God wants them to be. I don't want my mistakes to live on through them.

I scurry about, trying to do the things that make a household run, but just end up fumbling everything. The house is often messy, laundry is often dirty, dishes are often piled up, and the kids run wild. I'm learning to balance all these things, but there's always something to get in the way. I finally get things running smoothly and we all get sick or go to see family or have babies :). And then I start back at square one. But the days that I start right, on my knees before the Lord. I find victory. The house still isn't perfect, but improving, the kids still run wild, but feel loved. This is what I want. For God to be able to look down on my household and say, "It is good". That I'm focused on the things that matter.

14 Days of Love - Day 5 - Honeymoon

2011-02-07T21:26:00.000-08:00

Honeymoon... We had the best honeymoon ever! Our honeymoon was 2 weeks long, we first spent a week in snowbird, ut, in a timeshare provided by his parents. We got to hang out in the mountains, relax in our room, play shuffleboard. We made breakfast together, and ate at a nice restaurant. It was just what we needed to recover from our wedding. We then went home, opened our gifts from our wedding and then went on a cruise in the Caribbean. We visited st. Lucia, st martin, st. thomas, barbados, & somewhere else :). The beaches were beautiful, the water was crystal clear, sand was soft and white. The weather was perfect, the dinners on the ship were delicious. I had bought new dresses, and received some as gifts from my wedding party, to wear on my honeymoon, so I got to dress up in those. It was the best. I couldn't have asked for anything more.

Things I love about him: He's handsome (have I said that yet :) ) , adventurous, fun, & loves to make me happy :)

14 Days of Love - Day 4 - The Perfect Wedding

2011-02-07T21:10:00.000-08:00

The Perfect Wedding... Eric was the perfect groom. He didn't have many opinions about our wedding and let me have full reign on most things, but when I needed a decision made, he would make it for me. Preparing for my wedding was so much fun, my family and best friends were soo excited and made the event wonderful. The morning of my wedding, I was soo excited, I couldn't contain myself. I didn't get much sleep the night before, but it didn't slow me down. I went and got my hair done, it looked beautiful, I had told Eric that I was going to have it all up, which he didn't really like, but surprised him by having it only half up, with curls down my back. I had a tiara with a veil in the back, and the most beautiful wedding dress, that fit me just right. I did my own make up, so that it would look light and natural, I didn't want to look like someone else on my wedding day. I felt absolutely beautiful. Our wedding colors were silver and bubble gum pink, I had white & pink daisies everywhere. Everything was perfect, especially the handsome groom :)

Things I love about him: He's handsome & easy going

14 Days of Love - Day 3 - Engagement

2011-02-05T23:48:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry for the delay, life has gotten the best of me :( But I am turning it around now :)

Engagement... Eric's proposal, was a bit of a surprise, it wasn't a total shock, I was suspecting it, but I've always been a dreamer, so I figured I was wrong. It was Christmas morning, Eric wasn't able to go to utah for Christmas, because he was working at Costco and couldn't get time off. He was lucky that he had Christmas off. He came to our house on christmas morning, bearing gifts, which he placed under the tree. We waited for my sister and her family to come over and then began opening gifts. At one point, I was handed a gift, I opened it to find a brown box, inside the box in packing paper was a rock that was being held together with a rubber band, I took the rubber band off and out came a plastic green ring. Eric took the ring, got down on his knee and asked me to marry him, my family was standing by in shock. I said YES!! He gave me a kiss and I sat back stunned. I was so excited to be getting married!! The next few months were fun, but painfully long. Eric was super excited and soo much fun to be around during this time. The fact that he was committed to me changed his view of our relationship and it was a welcomed change.

Things I love about him: He's Family oriented, He likes to make me happy

14 Days of Love - Day 2 - Dating

2011-02-02T00:00:00.000-08:00

Dating... Some of my favorite dating memories are sitting in the quad at fullerton college, just hanging out in between classes. In the very beginning, I would find a spot in the library that I knew Eric would pass , just so that I could spend a few minutes with him. Sometimes I wouldn't even need to be at school anymore, but I would hang around just to see him. As we started to spend more time together, we would often hang out with nothing to do in between classes just basking in the warmth of the sun, talking about silly things that often weren't interesting to me, but I would pretend to be interested and just enjoy hearing him talk. We had a lot of special places at the school where we would hang out together or we would go for a walk and eat lunch at the taco bell nearby. I don't think he realized at the time, that he was winning my heart over, by taking me to my favorite fast food restaurant. One of my favorite times was when Eric was on the water polo team at fullerton college, I attended every game. I was so proud of his strength and agression in the game. It was just so much fun sitting in the bleachers and watching him play. I also enjoyed working in youth ministry together, the youth didn't know we were dating, but it was fun to see the way he worked with the youth and cared so much about them. It was during this time that I learned how much people are drawn to Eric. How comfortable they are around him and how he can always make an awkward or stressful room of people burst out laughing. He may not be a class clown, but he's great for a good laugh when it's most needed.

Things I love about him: He's laid back, dedicated to what he does, he's manly, friendly, & funny

14 Days of Love - Day 1 - When we first met

2011-02-01T08:30:00.000-08:00

Inspired by my friend, Nicole Milkie over at Olive Blue, I've decided to do a series called, 14 days of love, dedicated to my husband. I plan on sharing the reasons why I love my husband, along with little tidbits of our life together.

When We First Met... I didn't like Eric, it wasn't love at first sight. I told my friends they should stay away :) I soon found out that I was wrong, one of many times Eric would make me realize this. My mother's first impression was that he was a very nice boy, and she really liked him, the same impression my best friend had. I just wasn't interested. We saw each other regularly at a friends house where we would hang out around each other, but not with each other. The first time I talked to him was on my brother's birthday, we along with other friends got dressed up, prom style, and went out for birthdays (our 1st official night on the town). Over the months, I got used to seeing him around, and when he left to visit his family for the holidays, I noticed his absence. I missed the company at the game nights, and began to wonder why. When he came back, I talked to him briefly, and was happy to see him. This was the beginning of our love.

Things I love about him: He's great company

Advent Calendar Day 2

2010-12-02T15:09:00.000-08:00

Today we changed our calendar to 23, and added stockings which I found at michaels, in the scrapbooking section. They were originally stickers, I just took the backing off. Later we will put things in the stockings. I also used hooks for hook and eyes for the stockings.

Advent Calendar Day 1

2010-12-02T01:19:00.000-08:00

I have to put all of my crafty projects on my blog instead of facebook, because I don't want the whole world knowing that I'm a nerd, :) hehe. Anyways, here is a project that I started last christmas and am going to finish it this year, unless I go into labor before that happens. This is our advent calendar. I sewed all of these pieces on a piece of white felt on my sewing machine, I was able to add the train tracks on the rug using a stitch on my machine. Each day we are going to add something new to the picture and count down on the calendar. Today we added the christmas lights. I used hooks from hooks and eyes that I bought from michael's to string the lights on. I just hand stitched them on the sides of the tree, so you can take the lights off and on.

To keep these little hands and minds busy....

2010-08-12T23:12:00.000-07:00

Soo, I've been trying to think of someways to keep Alissa busy without having her destroying the house :) I've decided I'm going to try some montessori trays or shoe box bins, since I have a million of those (Why you ask? maybe I'm a bin hoarder, who knows... :) Timothy?? maybe we have something in common :) ) Anyways, I've got some ideas from: Counting Coconuts, and I figured I might as well blog about my journey...

So, here are the ones I'm going to do first, I'm trying to keep it simple, cheap, and still letting myself be a little creative... But I don't want to go crazy yet, I'll try a few simple ones first and then see how it goes...

1. Rainbow craft - This one seems fun, interesting, and easy. You take a piece of paper, draw outline of a rainbow, cut strips of different colored construction paper, let Alissa tear the pieces into small squares and then sort and glue on the rainbow, a few at a time.

2. Pouring rainbow rice from one container into a matching container - I found a tutorial on dying rice, which I thought Alissa would enjoy.

3. Spooning beans from on bowl to another - This one is easy, I will probably take a mixture of lentils and beans and call it bean soup :)

4. Toothpick pushing - This one sounds like a lot of fun, something I would enjoy doing :) You take something like flag toothpicks or umbrella toothpicks and a short cylinder piece of styrofoam and stick the toothpicks into the styrofoam

5. Tweezing flowers - All you need is flowers off of a lei, tweezers and two bowls. object is to use the tweezers to transfer the flowers from one bowl to the other

6. Sorting - for this one, I can either use a variety of things, but the one that interested me the most was the plastic ice cubes, I love the feel of them and think they will be a fun thing to play with, so I will need those or some beads and an ice cube tray, mancala board or something else of the sort, to sort these objects or to put them in a sequence. I may end up doing two of these..

7. Ice cream sensory tub - Last but not least I'm going to make one of these, Inspiration #1 & Inspiration #2

I'm going to find my supplies at either a dollar store, craft store, or thrift store. Hopefully I can get any supplies I need next week :)

Sharing a smile! If you like it vote for @JessAlissAnth and help them win an iPad :) @smilegen

2010-06-04T15:27:00.000-07:00

Sharing a smile! If you like it vote for @JessAlissAnth and help them win an iPad :) @smilegen

Mother Day!!

2010-05-09T22:53:00.000-07:00

This felt like my first mother's day, because Alissa is now old enough to understand. Earlier this week Alissa watched a Go Deigo Go! about mother's day, and since then she had plans to go with Daddy to pick out a present for me for mother's day. So on Saturday Alissa went to her dance class and then to the store for my presents. This morning when she woke up she was soo excited. The first thing she said was, "Daddy, it's mother's day?". Eric told her it was and she said, "Come on, Let's go wrap presents!". So Eric and Alissa went and wrapped my presents and then when they were done she came and told me to come and open my presents. She was so cute as she watched me open each present and asked me if I liked them. I got a robe (which I asked for), a box of Super Mario Brother's Gummies, and a Cleaning brush that looks like a lady. She picked out the last two gifts herself. I also got a cute Happy Mother's day followed by a hug and kiss. The whole day she was sweet, giving me hugs and telling me she loved me. It was really special!

Free groceries

2010-03-02T10:32:00.001-08:00

Cool contest I found to win free groceries for a year

Hey, I just entered this contest on Cozi.com to win free groceries for a year. All you have to do is put in your email address.

Even if you don’t enter, please click the link to help me win. (I get an extra entry for telling you.) Thanks!

View >>

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Isn't she stylish

2010-02-02T11:20:00.001-08:00

Alissa likes to pick her own clothes and accesories :)

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Cloth Diaper reviews

2010-01-31T21:56:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to let you all see this, this lady is doing a cloth diaper review, I'm interested to see which ones she likes best, although I don't think she is testing the gDiapers, which are what I use and like the best, I use the gCloth inserts and they work better than any I've tried. Here is a link to her review: http://luvsjurn3.blogspot.com/2009/12/cloth-diapers-exposed.html

15 Minute Tackle

2010-01-21T15:17:00.000-08:00

I may be a little late, but I'm going to commit to doing the 15 minute tackle with The Domestic Contessa , I'm going to focus on Laundry, if I spend at least 15 minutes a day, maybe I can catch up on the laundry, especially because my little girl is going on vacation and she will need clothes to take with her :) Here is a link to the post if you would like to join too!

This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!!

2010-01-13T21:51:00.000-08:00

For almost a week now, I've just been bursting with joy. I'm not sure exactly what has changed in my life, all I know is that God has placed joy in my heart and I'm so thankful for the change it has made in me. I want to spend time with people and laugh and have a good time. I'm enjoying each moment with my kids, rejoicing in every smile and cherishing every hug. I'm filled with love for my husband that is richer and stronger than it's ever been. I'm just so thrilled to have life and love and a beautiful, healthy family. I'm going to hang on to this joy as long as I can and pray that God keeps refilling my joy in times that it gets hard: Rejoice in the Lord always; and again I say, Rejoice!!

Twirl skirt

2010-01-10T23:33:00.000-08:00

My sister sent this link to me,

isn't this skirt adorable? I just love it, I would like to make one of these or something like it, but she doesn't have a tutorial, so I've searched for others, here are a few of my favorites, Next I just need to pick up some material, so I can start on a few projects.. :)

Easy Skirt Tutorial

Teired Skirt, AKA the twirl skirt

Twirly Skirt Tutorial

My next project: Sewing Machine cover:

2010-01-09T17:58:00.000-08:00

I am about to start decorating my dining room because I received a coca cola table and chair set for christmas, which I will show you later, but now that I have my sewing machine in my dining room I'm going to make a cover for it that will be cute, here is the one I'm going to use:

Sewing Machine Cover tutorial

Here are a few More

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

2010-01-07T23:48:00.000-08:00

I'm a follower of Stay At Home Mommy A.K.A. Babychaser. She reminds me of myself in many ways, on of which being she has a son that is 3 months older than my daughter, and a baby girl that is a year older than Anthony. I find comfort and encouragement when reading her blog, because she is in the same season of life that I am, at home with toddlers, making messes :). But today's blog was more than I could ask for. I had a rough day today, it took me until 1pm to finish getting dressed and ready for the day, and broke down in tears when my daughter put a brand new roll of toilet paper in the sink (she's done this about 10 times although I've never caught her in the act, just found the soaking toilet paper roll). Needless to say, everything about my day was frustrating me, and more than once I grumbled or complained about something, I called my husband to let him know of my frustrations a couple times (which I know just blesses his day). I got through the day however, and Alissa was just a sweetheart, telling me it's okay mommy, don't cry, lets read this book, it'll be fun!, patting my back saying, shh shh shh. But now as I'm going to bed, I sit and read this post and the post by Kristin and I'm inspired to give God my frustrations and get rid of my bad attitude. Psalm 19:14 is one of my favorite bible verses:

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.

This is my prayer and verse for this year

Sewing or Scrapbooking, How about Sewing while Scrapbooking?

2010-01-05T22:02:00.000-08:00

My mom told me today that she's not interested in sewing right now, she wants to scrapbook... So I started wondering if you could sew while scrapbooking, So here are some tutorials for sewing on scrapbook pages:

Beading & Sewing on Scrapbook pages

Hand Stitching on Scrapbook pages

Embroidered Titles

Machine Stitching on Scrapbook Pages

This looks like a lot of fun!! I like the looks of the hand stitching better than the machine stitching. Enjoy!

Purse organizers, are they worth it?

2010-01-04T22:47:00.000-08:00

I've seen these on the internet a lot when looking for tutorials, Has anybody ever used one of these before?

Here is a tutorial for it, I've seen another one that uses interfacing instead of batting, depends on if you want it stiffer or not..

Here is a slightly more complicated version of this, which I find interesting: These are the kinda things that make me want to take these and create one that fits exactly what I would need it to do (Hold diapers, and bottles, and baby food :) )! That's what I enjoy the most about sewing is letting my creativity take something and make it better :)

Oven Hand Mitt Tutorial

2010-01-03T22:34:00.000-08:00

I saw this tutorial and fell in love with it, I wish I would've seen it before christmas, it would've made a great christmas gift! Maybe next year. I'm going to start posting fun and cute tutorials on my blog maybe one a day - for a while, I would say for a year, but I know that I often do finish what I start :) Oh well, Here is the first one. Can't wait to make one of these:

30 Day Cleaning Challenge - Day 3

2009-09-23T23:45:00.000-07:00

Cleaned for: 15 min

Living Cleaner Rule of the Day: Rinse your dishes and put them in the dishwasher!!! This should be a no brainer...

Normally I wouldn't have done any cleaning today. I spent the day at my moms house and was not in the mood to clean this morning, I got up late today and was tired and just in a poor mood. So I left the house and figured I would worry about cleaning later. So when I got home tonight, I knew that if I didn't clean tonight, I would have to tell you all about it and give you a poor excuse for not doing it. This motivated me to do at least 15 min of cleaning. But once I got started I was able to clean for a longer amount of time. I even enjoyed it... Tonight I picked up a little in my bedroom and then went to the kitchen and emptied the dishwasher, loaded it, forgot to start it :) better go do that now. And then decided to clean my stove because I just got a new stove cleaner and stove scrubbers. I have an electric stove, which I didn't know how to clean, so I've just been wiping them down and over this past year, it's gotten food and grease just burnt onto, so it will take a while to get all that off. But the cleaner seemed to work okay, if anybody has any experience with this.. please let me know.

My Stove, after I cleaned it....

30 Day Cleaning Challenge - Day 2

2009-09-22T16:05:00.000-07:00

Cleaned for: 15 min

Living Cleaner rule of the day: Take Care of Paperwork as it's brought into the house. If I need to keep a coupon for some reason, I should either stick it in my file cabinet or purse. I also have tons of Papers that I carry around with me: Menu's, Calendars, Craft instructions, etc. I need to either stick them in the file cabinet or hole punch them and stick them in a notebook.

So, I only cleaned for 15 min today, and I focused on the area that you were going to see in the picture. :) How's that for motivation...hehe... It still looks messy to me, but it's livable, and that is important. See you all tomorrow... 2 days down, 28 more to go....

I love bright spring colors!!

2009-09-22T15:51:00.000-07:00

I know it's fall, and I'm starting to enjoy fall more, but I love spring!! I love bright cheerful colors, they just make me happy. I saw this couch today at PB Teen, not even sure how I ended up there, but I love it!!! I Don't like the yellow walls, but I love the pretty blue couch. I then went to look at the rugs, because I would love to have a rug for my hard wood floors, so Anthony can enjoy tummy time in my living room. Take a look at these, I like almost all of them. Tell me which one you like the best: Pottery Barn Teen Rugs

Aren't sleeping babies adorable?

2009-09-21T23:57:00.000-07:00

I love taking pictures of Anthony sleeping, but it doesn't do justice to how cute they are when they are sleeping. I just love his chunky cheeks, his chubby rolls, the way his is sprawled out, and the sound of his breathing/snoring.

And in case anybody was wondering, don't try washing your baby with bubble bath, it will drip down his head and leave red marks. He didn't mind, but we felt really bad looking at the red streaks he had on his face. I guess bubble bath is not the same as baby wash... who knew...

My Handmade Diaper Bag

2009-09-21T23:35:00.001-07:00

Here is my diaper bag, I used a how to make your own diaper bag pattern that I found online. I had to do some calculations... and I also got some tips from: sewchristine. I used batting in between the outer layer and the liner, but if I did it again, I'd probably use interfacing to make it stiffer. I also forgot to sew the straps while I was sewing the layers together, so I had to do those afterwards (as you can see in the bottom picture)

Here is the inside of the bag, I made a pocket for my IPhone, keys, and a bottle or sippy cup. You can barely see that pocket on the right side of the bag. I put that on the inside, so that it wouldn't look like a diaper bag, but more like a purse. Pretty cool, huh? I really enjoyed making this and was able to do it in about 3 evenings...

30 Day Cleaning Challenge - Day 1

2009-09-21T23:12:00.000-07:00

Cleaned for: 45 min

Living Cleaner rule of the day: Clean off the entire table before each meal (and that doesn't mean move the items to another counter)

I didn't clean for as long as I felt like I should've, but I did spend time picking up. I completed the bathroom and the hallway and made progress in the living room, dining room, and kitchen. Here is my messy living room at the end of the day. Hopefully I'll be able to show you a much cleaner living room tomorrow. I felt like I was fighting an uphill battle because Alissa wouldn't let me put away any of her toys. She would gasp in shock anytime I tried to put her purses in her toy drawer.

These are the toys that she's been playing with and leaving all over the place.

30 day Cleaning Challenge

2009-09-21T17:46:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I'm going to start my cleaning challenge today. My house isn't quite spotless, but if I clean daily, it will get cleaner everyday. Each day I will post a new cleaning rule and tell you a little about my cleaning adventures. I was going to post pictures about my cleaning out stuff first, but my camera died, so I have to recharge the battery before I can put the pictures on my computer, so you'll have to wait for that. Here I go for Day 1 - as soon as I'm finished I will write the post for Day 1

Just an update - more coming soon

2009-09-16T10:21:00.000-07:00

So, you may think I've dropped the ball and am hiding out now, but I didn't I'm just trying to get on a better schedule and haven't found a good time to blog. I finished going through my clothes, Alissa's toys, and Dishes. I have pictures that I will post, I promise :) My house is looking good, I've been working on getting it clean and organized. We've decided to hire a maid to do the heavy cleaning so I don't have to worry about it for a while and that will help me to keep the house clean. If somebody knows of a good, but also cheap house cleaner or cleaning service, please let me know. I still have some stuff to go through, but wanted to get the house clean first and then go through all the random areas that need to be organized. Here is a list to get me started:

Closet bookshelf - getting rid of 1/2
Linen/Game closet - getting rid of 1/2
Laundry Room - just cleaning and organizing
Food - just cleaning and organizing
Paperwork - getting rid of 1/2
Desk - just cleaning and organizing

That's all I can think of so far, I'll probably do more later. I'm going to start my 30 day cleaning challenge on Monday. I should be able to get everything cleaned and ready by then.

1/2 the Mass to 1/2 the Mess - Day 2 - Toys

2009-09-10T00:16:00.000-07:00

So today I had the pleasure of going through all of Alissa's toys. She is a very generous girl and was willing to give a lot of her toys away, if she was going to give them to Alexis, her little cousin. I hope Alexis wants toys, because we have plenty for her. I'm falling a little behind and was not able to finish the toys or the clothes today, but I will not have a car tomorrow, so unless somebody comes and rescues me, I will be home all day and will be able to finish going through and organizing clothes, toys, and the complete my next section: dishes. Tomorrow I will post some pictures of my finished work.

1/2 the Mass to 1/2 the Mess - Day 1 - Clothes

2009-09-09T01:44:00.000-07:00

Ok, So I went through millions (or so it seemed) of clothes yesterday, I had to go through Alissa's, Anthony's, & My clothes, and set Eric's aside so that he can go through those. I didn't finish completely but I had to go to bed, so I wanted to at least post what I've done so far and what I will do today.

I started in the closet:

Before: After:

I still have a few things in there to get rid of in there, but I need help from my fashion consultant (Eric)

Next I went through my dresser:

Before: After:

I know that it looks bare in there now, but most of the clothes that I prefer to wear are in the dirty clothes pile. Which is what I did next, I gathered all the dirty clothes and sorted those only putting back the clothes that I want to keep.

My Beginning Pile: My Giving Away Pile:
Next I went into Alissa's Room and went through and organized her clothes, I did this about a month ago, so there wasn't a lot to get rid of.

Before: After:
I then went through all of Anthony's clothes and had to get rid of all of his 3-6 months clothes because he's grown out of them.

His Clothes organized: Clothes going to storage:

I didn't finish going through our linens, and these are the clothes that I still need to go through:

Here are Eric's clothes that he needs to go through:

The Clothes I'm giving away:

And Finally, Alissa and Anthony keeping busy while I sort clothes. I later found Alissa dumping all of our Chocolate milk mix on the floor, luckily Eric walked through the door a minute later and cleaned up the mess.

Clean House Challenge

2009-09-08T16:10:00.000-07:00

Ok, I'm going to start a new challenge, and am going to need you to keep me accountable. I'm going to start out with:

1/2 the Mass to 1/2 the Mess Challenge - I'm going to get rid of 1/2 of our:

Clothes
Toys
Dishes
Garage
Random Areas, such as paperwork, books, etc...

I'm going to take one day for each area, so by saturday I will be done with this part of the challenge. The goal of this is to get rid of stuff, so it will be easier to keep the house clean. Then I will take 1 or 2 days to get the house completely clean.

Next part of the challenge will be to start a habit. It takes 30 days to create or break a habit, so I will take 30 days to create a habit of picking up the house daily at the same time. This is the part I struggle with, so every day I will blog about it and also create a new rule for living cleaner, such as put trash straight into the trash can.

After I complete the challenge I'm going to decorate my house, that will be my reward for living cleaner.

Felt Food - My Newest Hobby

2009-09-01T01:53:00.000-07:00

I've started a new hobby, that I really enjoy! I'm making Felt Food Toys. I know Alissa will love them and they are cute and easy to make and the supplies are cheap!! This is my first try, It was fun, I did these ones by hand using the blanket stitch, which I just learned and have gotten much better at. Next I'm going to make a donut using my sewing machine, It will go much quicker, but I like the way the blanket stitch looks, so we'll see how it looks on the sewing machine.

Workout

2009-07-03T09:40:00.000-07:00

I did my first workout today, It was not bad, I did pushups, squats, situps (crunchs). I'm a little sore from my test yesterday and probably should've waited a day to let my muscles rest, but I was too excited to get started. I'll probably do it again on sunday or monday.

Pee-Pee in the Pottay!! Pee-Pee in the Pottay!!

2009-07-02T18:15:00.000-07:00

So Alissa has been potty training her dolls lately... so I figured it was time to start potty training her. Not that I haven't been trying, I've tried everything, till the other day I told her if she went in the potty, I'd buy her whatever she wanted. Then I remembered she wanted skates, so I told her we would go buy skates if she went. Then I made her sit on the potty for a long time, eventually she went and was so excited. We went out and got her skates, and she just loved them. Then she went back into her pull ups for a week and a half... Until today, I printed out a potty chart for her, and explained it to her, I told her if she went she'd get a sticker and candy, and then we do a potty dance, Plenty of rewards... She's gone five times today, and just loves it. She hasn't gone poo poo in the potty yet, or told me she needs to go. Of course, I haven't given her the chance, I just make her go a lot, and she pretty much just goes on command, if she can, she'll go. So the next step will be poo poo in the potty.

Here she is with her chart, She has Nemo stickers that she loves to use, she's very proud of her chart. I got it from this website: Potty Training Concepts

Here she is on her potty! And below is the potty dance:

Sit up and squats challenge TOO!!

2009-07-02T16:43:00.000-07:00

So we decided to do the sit up and squat challenge at the same time as the push up challenge. I did my initial tests and could do 25 sit ups, and 50 squats. I guess my legs are the strongest, even though they often feel weak. can't wait to start the challenges tomorrow.

100 Push Up Challenge

2009-07-02T15:59:00.000-07:00

So, I'm going to try to do the one hundred push up challenge with my friend Nicole I took the initial test and was able to do 3 almost good form pushups, so I will be starting at the lowest level. I'm starting the challenge tomorrow. I'm supposed to do it 3 days a week. If anybody else wants to join us, it will be very fun.

Anthony's Smiling

2009-06-18T08:55:00.000-07:00

Anthony started smiling about 2 weeks ago. Isn't he cute? I decided to go off of dairy, per my sisters advice, so that maybe Anthony won't be so fussy. It seems to have helped a lot. He's been happier and awake more. He's starting to be interested in toys too. He just stares at his mobile on his swing and will smile and laugh at it.

Here is alissa sleeping with a cat at my friend Michelle's house. She love's nando and tshelle. They really like kids too, so we like to hang out with them. We were at their house for a bbq. Alissa is great when we go to parties. She just charms everybody there. She really likes our friends and will talk about them at home.

Coming back from my trip has been hard, I have a lot of stuff to do, but the trip has thrown me off my groove. I need to get back on track. I'm trying to start with getting the house picked up, but it is the thing that I dislike the most. The day that they invent a robot that can pick stuff up and know where it goes, I will be a happy girl. Never again will I have to waste time picking up, I can just go out and enjoy my life.

Alissa and Anthony

2009-05-15T15:04:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures I thought I would share with you, I took these on May 1, 2009 Anthony is 1 month old.

My Favorite Sister

2009-04-30T14:10:00.000-07:00

Christmas 2008

As I work on being responsible, getting things done, and trying to do what God has called me to do, I can't help but think about my sister, Julee. If there is one person that I wish I could be like, it would be her. She is who I want to someday be. The things that she is able to handle, the way that God uses her, and even the things that people tell me about her is inspirational. People are always sharing with me how wonderful and sweet my sister is and how she helped them in some way, all I can do is agree with them. I am always trying to learn from her wisdom and strength. And usually the thing that amazes me the most is that fact that she enjoys spending time with me. I don't know why, I don't have much to offer her, but I'm grateful that she does. Maybe this is what it's like to have a big sister, always admiring and looking up to her, but I think that God has blessed me in a big way, by giving me a sister that is always honoring and following Him with everything that is in her. I have seen God do amazing things in her, because she is always consistent and diligent. I'm sure much of this reflecting has to do with the fact that I miss her and her 5 precious kids, since I haven't seen them in over a week. Anyways, I love you, Julee

Toddler Menu for Alissa

2009-04-27T16:48:00.000-07:00

Here are my menu's for Alissa for the next two days. I didn't include dinners, because I have those already prepared and in the freezer, I will just make sure to get all the components of the Pyramid Plan. This is only for two days, because I will be preparing the next few days after I've tried these, so I can make adjustments and so I can order from the vegetable lady. I'll try to prepare as much of the food ahead of time, in case, I want to go somewhere, I'll have all the food ready to take with me.

New Beginnings

2009-04-24T15:17:00.000-07:00

Anthony Eric Jacobs

As we welcome the arrival of our newest family member, Anthony Eric Jacobs, I've decided to take this as an opportunity to start over. I'm going to start taking on my responsibilities with a new sense of pride and joy. I've started a new schedule for Alissa, putting her to bed at 9pm with a nap at 2pm. Today she went down for a nap at exactly 2pm. That is why I have a chance to blog, both kids are sleeping, Yeah!

I've also started disciplining her, and it has been great to see her decide to make good decisions instead of disobeying. Today we were going to the car and running a bit late, so I told her to go get in her carseat, and I could tell she was thinking about wanting to drive the car (she really likes to play like she's driving the car with eric). She was about to start throwing a fit and I gave her a warning and immediately she went and got in her carseat, it was amazing.

I'm also about to start working on feeding her more healthy foods, and making sure she's getting the proper servings of the 5 food groups. I will be using the MyPyramid for toddlers site as a guide.

And, last but not least, Anthony, is doing well, He's finally on a better eating schedule, eating every 2 hours instead of every hour. He also sleeps great at night, he sleeps with me and eric and nurses throughout the night, but I'm able to get good sleep.

Here for your viewing pleasure, Alissa at the zoo, our christmas gift from the Huy Family, zoo passes:

Blog Burglar

2009-02-22T23:30:00.001-08:00

Hi Everyone, I just wanted to warn you that somebody is going around on blogs, and posting blogs on other peoples blog sites. The previous blog was not posted by me!!! Although I don't mind taking the credit for it, I just wanted to warn you that she might do the same to you... Just watch out for a mother of 5 that seems sweet & innocent, she may even be married to a pastor, but really she's a blog swiper.

Besides having my blog broken into, All is well with me, I just had a baby shower today, that was very fun, My friends in my new bible study threw it for me at Julee's house. It was very sweet of them and blessed me a lot. I'm currently 33 weeks along, only 7 more weeks to go. I'm trying to clean out some stuff in my house and make room to set up the crib and changing table and stuff. That's going ok, it just seems like I always have more stuff than I know what to do with. I've been trying to get rid of stuff that I don't need, or haven't used in a long time, but sometimes I think I need more than I actually do.

Alissa is doing well, she's talking a lot, and even says some sentences. We haven't been potty training too much, I've decided to take a more relaxed stance, and wait till she's ready, She still enjoys the process of sitting on the potty and stuff, but doesn't actually go. She knows exactly who to ask for what, She asks Grandpa for candy, Grandma for mints, Auntie for cookies, and Daddy for Ice Cream. And she asks with the sweetest most angelic face possible, she says, "Pleeese I Cweem, Pleeese" and if you don't give it to her quick enough, she'll give you kisses, hoping that's what will win you over.

2009-02-11T21:19:00.000-08:00

Christmas

2008-12-28T13:23:00.000-08:00

Here are pics from our Christmas, We had a lot of fun having christmas with Alissa this year, she is old enough to enjoy opening, and receiving presents. She loved all of her gifts, and has been playing with them nonstop since she got them.

Our Gifts under our snowman christmas tree. We had a christmas tree that we were going to take from Grandma's house, because they couldn't get one, because maury's allergic. But the tree got rained on multiple times and by the time we had the time to pick it up, it was only a couple days before christmas and it was too big of a hassle. I had a christmas tree poster like this snowman, but Alissa likes snowmen, so we decided she'd enjoy this much better than a silly tree.

Alissa's Stocking

Opening her first gift

Posing with her Little People

Opening Presents at Grandma's House

Eric & I

Our Favorite Gifts, I got the salsa from Josh & Heidi. Eric got the pan scraper from me.

Alissa & Nathan opening presents

Crawling Blanket

2008-12-28T13:15:00.000-08:00

I had to share this cool blanket that I made, I'm very proud of it:

I made this for Alexis. She can lay in the middle and crawl to the things all over the blanket, They are all different textures and colors, to help stimulate learning in a baby. I got the idea from a Gymboree play and learn book, and just gathered different materials that I could find in my house, and put it together to make this blanket. It was a lot of fun, and pretty simple. I did run out of the blanket edging stuff (whatever it's called). So I will have to fix that later.

My New Couch

2008-12-28T12:20:00.000-08:00

I finally got a new couch for Christmas, my first ever!! LaNette bought me a slipcover for my couch. It makes my couch look soooo much better. Here are my before and after pictures

Before:

After:

Looks Cool huh!

The Joys of Motherhood

2008-12-12T01:34:00.000-08:00

So, I've been wanting to blog for a long time, about random things that Alissa is doing, but I lost my camera, and I really wanted to be able to post pictures along with the blog. So, I'm going to blog tonight and then get my old camera that doesn't work as well and post pictures tomorrow.

I've been really enjoying motherhood, and have found that all my emotions have been intensified since I've become pregnant. I got to experience Alissa's first bloody cut and her second all in one day. On November 19, I was pushing Alissa in an umbrella stroller, she had sat down in the stroller probably 1 minute before. Next thing I know, I was stopping and Alissa fell out on her face. I went to help her up thinking, that she was fine, and found blood on her mouth. She had fallen asleep in the stroller and when she fell she cut her lip. My mom was with me and she was able to take charge, we were in line at the grocery store, so she asked the worker to go get some popsicles. Alissa was fine after that, just a little fat lip. Later that day, we flew to Utah for thanksgiving and before we were going to bed, Alissa started jumping on the bed, she fell, and hit her head on the wall, on a chair rail. Again, thinking she was fine, I went to help her and when I saw her face, she had a nice cut above her eyebrow, I proceeded to run her upstairs where Eric was to figure out what to do about it. We then asked LaNette if she thought she would need stitches, and instead, we just put a butterfly bandage on it. Now, Alissa handled all these incidents rather well, but that night I was an emotional mess. It's so hard to watch your precious baby girl get hurt and know that you could have been more careful and prevented both of them. I don't know how parents do it over and over again, but I just pray that my kids don't get hurt more than a couple times.

Alissa has been learning new words, at an amazing speed. Eric and I, marvel at how quickly she learns. Just the other day, I showed her a snowman on my sock and now she knows the word, "snowan" and points them out all the time. She has also picked up the phrase, "bye, adios" from Handy Manny. It is very cute when she says that. She also walks around the house saying, "oohh, Peete", and "ooh toodles" from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. As you can see she watches slightly too much tv, she's learned to use sign language and talk from it. She is also trying to get me to potty train her. She asks to go potty every so often, and she doesn't usually go, but she sits on the potty for a second, then says she's all done, jumps off and flushes the toilet. But just yesterday, she went in her potty for the first time. At first she was worried that she wasn't supposed to, but I let her know that it was good.

I'm also getting excited for a new little one around the house, I'm now 23 weeks. And the baby is starting to move a lot more often. For those of you who don't know, we picked out names. If it's a girl, Juliana Joy, after Julee, and if it's a boy, Anthony Eric, after Tony. Eric and I are very happy with the names we chose and while Eric is hoping for little Anthony, I'm hoping for sweet Juliana.

Victory and Mourning...

2008-10-16T22:08:00.000-07:00

So, I did it, I got my house clean and not only presentable, but beautiful, in my opinion. I am very proud of my accomplishment and was able to let the girls in, knowing that I went above and beyond. I don't normally do that, normally while people are at my house I'm looking at small messes all around, wishing I had spent more time cleaning it. I know that God is doing a work in me and He has empowered me to do this, because it is totally out of character. I finally feel victory in my life, I've been struggling for a very long time. I've been letting my weaknesses and sins, rule my life, and for the first time, probably since I've been married, I finally feel like I've overcome it. I've finally surrendered to God, telling Him I just can't do it. I'm unable. I've thought for years, I just need to try harder. Push more, but no matter what I did, I'd fail, I could do one thing well, but everything else would slip. So I tried to balance life, by catching the area that was falling the furthest, just hoping I could keep things from hitting the floor. But now I see, that I can't do it and if I just let go, and put God first, then He'll hold everything for me. He'll give me the strength to get things done and keep them up. It feels glorious and it's so neat to see how much my relationship with God effects my family. Eric and Alissa, both enjoy and are changed by the change God is doing in me.

My night with the girls was very neat, as a group we went through the study and were able to encourage a few of the girls that are struggling with different areas in their marriage or life, while going through the study. After the study, when we normally do prayer requests, one of the girls, shared with us that her and her mom are struggling, because her stepdad has cancer, and he is not responding to any treatment, they are having trouble with the fact that God blessed her mom with a wonderful christian husband, and is now taking him away. They have only been married for a short time, maybe 4-7 years. She loves her mom dearly and is hurting for her the most. Watching her struggle with this was so hard, my heart just broke for her, knowing that she just wanted the best for her mom, and she felt so helpless, and maybe even betrayed. We shared some thoughts with her, encouraging her that God will still take care of her mom, no matter what happens, and then laid our hands on her and all prayed for her and her family. You could tell when she left, that a burden had been lifted from her shoulders and she had a small ray of hope. I tell you all this asking for prayer for her and her family, his name is Jim, he also has 2 children of his own, that are avoiding the situation. Please pray that if God doesn't choose to heal him, that he will end well, and that his family will find peace and comfort, despite the situation.

I was talking to Eric tonight about how hard it is to be in a place where God is blessing us and our life is good, while people all around us are hurting and going through hard and difficult times. Our families are dealing with hard things, and we have a hard time reaching out to them and wish we could just take the pain on ourselves, but we can't. And we still need to enjoy the blessings that God has given us, but sometimes, it makes me feel so shallow. Because I can't fully understand what other people are going through. I don't know how Julee is feeling right now, or what LaNette is going through without Daviance, and I want to help them, but I don't know how, so instead I just ignore it hoping to take the hurt from them by distracting them, the way I've always dealt with my pain. So my prayer for today, is that God would teach me how to mourn with those who mourn, to feel their pain and bless them. Pray that God would be able to use me in these situations rather than letting me run and hide until the storm passes.

The trouble we go through to get what we want

2008-10-14T09:35:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I was reading my bible study, and I heard Alissa pushing something into the kitchen. I got up to see what she was doing. She was pushing one of our kitchen chairs into the kitchen so she could climb up onto the chair and reach the tortilla chips that were on the counter. It was the first time she's ever done that. It made me think about all the trouble I will go through just to get what I want. I will put forth all sorts of energy to get it, but when it comes to a responsibility, I suddenly have no energy and decide that I just can't do it. If I could put half the energy that I put to do something that I want into doing something I need to do, I would practically be able to conquer the world :) ok, not quite, but I would be able to actually accomplish something. Today, and tomorrow, I will be able to put this into practice, because I committed to hosting our girls bible study at my house. Which means I need a clean, presentable house by wednesday night. And I need to be ready to lead the study. I'm very excited for the challenge of leading the study, I will be the first one leading this study, kind of scary, but exciting. Please pray for me, that I will be prepared and that God will use me.

The Power of a praying wife

2008-10-10T16:44:00.000-07:00

I'm currently in a bible study with 8 girls that are my age and married. We just finished going through the bible study, Search for significance. That was a very good study, and I learned a lot from it. This week we are starting a new study. The power of a praying wife. I'm very excited to do this study, as I'm not very good at praying for my husband, and I'm always trying to fix him. When most of the time I know that I'm the one that needs to be fixed. But it's easier to blame him for my problems. I started reading the first chapter today and already have been touched by the study. I'm trying to do a little of the study everyday. In hopes to finish the first chapter by Wednesday when I meet with my girls again. The beginning of the study talked about us needing to pray for ourselves before we pray for our husbands, and be willing to change instead just wanting our husbands to change. I've examined my heart and know that I'm willing and ready to change. I feel like I have been dormant for a long time, not really changing just surviving. And now, I'm ready to make a change, ready to feel God working in my life, even if it means hard, difficult times. So, my prayer for today is that God will start working in my heart and preparing me for the change that He is going to put me through and that I will be diligent with the study and set aside time for it everyday. I'm committing to spend 15 min a day on the study, and going to complete that 15 min sometime between 11-1.